Stop Trying To Be A Good Person
Do you still do any of these things....
Care about the opinions of others on you
Feel like your being judged
Care that you need to look a certain way
Care that you need to act a certain way so people like you
Have attachment to objects
Try keeping up to date with everyone else
Secretly trying to be better then everyone else
When people say you can't do something, you listen
Wait for people to acknowledge that you are a good person
Wait for validation from others to know that you are ok
Too scared to be different
Not doing the very thing you want to do because your scared of others opinions
Never speak up because your worried about the way you will look
Deciding not to shine so you don't upset anyone
You can say thank you to society for fucking up your thinking. I have totally been in this place, and it sucks and is totally a self defeating trap!! I've experienced being everyone else and not myself, because I didn't quite know who I was, what my values were, what I stood for and I had no idea it was ok to just be me. To not fit in a box that is so unbelievably suffocating that I was living a complete lie. I was caged in my own body, and as I write this it sends shivers down my spine to remenise on that time in the past. I remember not being able to speak or move my body in a way that I felt confident in my own skin, my own body can you believe it??
Nobody is going to make life happen for you, people don't wake up everyday and think how can I make her/him feel ok. Everyone has the responsibility of worrying about themselves, while you think everyone is judging you, your really judging yourself and those around you. And that anxiety you feel, that's because you know the solution to your problems but continue to ignore your intuition on what you need to do because of fear of the unknown. Or maybe because your scared of being responsible for your own life and emotions.
Be a rebel, take back your own will power, focus on what brings you happiness, go do that thing, discover what your made out of, speak up, move your body with love and confidence, don't wait for validation from anyone it's never going to come, have standards and boundaries, say what you want to say and if you screw up go and apologise or fix the mistake and never do it again. Be ok with being wrong, actually be wrong as quick as you can to then find out what is a better quality way or thought that serves you. Just fucking be YOU, and if you don't know who you is get some help from someone who can guide you in finding out your own answers.